


Our Love's Like Stardust

by ignitethestars



Category: Rogue One: A Star Wars Story (2016), Star Wars - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, Cuddling & Snuggling, F/M, Love Confessions, Mild Hurt/Comfort
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-14
Updated: 2017-02-14
Packaged: 2018-09-24 12:31:44
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,034
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9727016
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ignitethestars/pseuds/ignitethestars
Summary: Jyn has been acting weird recently, and it has the entire Rogue team worried. When Cassian stumbles upon her crying one afternoon, he decides to try to cheer her up.





	

**Author's Note:**

> This was written for the 2017 Rebelcaptain Network Secret Valentine exchange and is gifted to the fantastic starlight-down. Hope you enjoy it, love!
> 
> P.S.
> 
> Major kudos to hanorganaas for betaing!

It was the Rebellion’s second base in a couple of months. Each time they got comfortable, the Empire would come knocking at their door. Then They would have no choice to pack up and leave.

 

Their current base was on a planet called Aegaeon, and it was constantly ravaged by storms. The windspeed was around fifty miles an hour at best. Lightning flashed across the sky more times than a protocol droid could count, and thunder boomed frequently.

 

Cassian made his way through the base, the steel floors slick from rain that had been brought in. He tried to ignore the various officers that flinched whenever the storm got too loud. It sounded unnervingly, like a battle. One that never ceased.

 

He had once heard a saying rumble through the mess hall. He did not know the origin of it:  _ Battles leave scars, some you can't see. _

 

Cassian knew that all too well. He knew it when he saw the faces of the men and women he’d killed as he closed his eyes to sleep. He knew it by the screams he heard while asleep, far too many for any one person to hear, before he would wake up with perspiration trickling down his forehead and into his eyes.

 

Battles did leave scars. Some people were just better at hiding it than others.

 

As Cassian stepped into the mess hall for breakfast, he immediately recognized the ones that had had practice at hiding it and the ones that didn't. The only person who seemed completely unphased by the storm was the sandy blonde Luke Skywalker. He smiled at Cassian as he walked past, before going back to his conversation with Wedge Antilles and Sabine Wren.

 

Cassian took his seat beside Bodhi Rook. The Imperial Pilot jumped when another bout of thunder shook the whole base.

 

Chirrut placed a comforting hand on Bodhi’s shoulder. 

 

“The true storm is not the one out there, but the one here.” He said as he tapped Bodhi lightly in the chest with his index finger.

 

Bodhi stared at him for a long moment then nodded, but still looking unconvinced. His hands shook as he went to take another bite out of his breakfast.

 

The sound of clattering silverware brought Cassian’s attention to the opposite side of the table. Jyn Erso sat silently, eating with the pace of a man who had not ate in several days. Her chestnut colored hair had been chopped short in the past few weeks, but was still long enough to hang around her face like a curtain. 

 

If Cassian was truly honest with himself, he was worried about Jyn. Her behavior had grown more brusque since their relocation. It was something that Kaytoo had even commented on one afternoon after she had snapped at the droid for correcting her on the proper way to clean a blaster.

 

As soon as she had cleaned her plate of all food, Jyn stood up and left without so much of a glance in his direction. Cassian wondered  if he had done something to upset her. He turned his head to Bodhi. Before the captain could even ask, Bodhi shrugged.

 

“She’s been like that for days. She's even stopped playing Sabaac with Baze.” Bodhi whispered, looking after her. The concern on his face was mirroring the worry Cassian felt.

 

“Yes,” Baze said, interrupting Cassian's thoughts. “Now I am stuck playing with the insufferable Solo.”

 

“In case you couldn't tell, Baze has lost more games than he has won.” Chirrut said with a chuckle. The guardian’s husband shot him a glare, but did not deny the statement either.

 

Cassian couldn't muster up the energy to be amused by the couple's antics. The stress of upcoming missions and Jyn's worrying behavior was sapping the energy from his body like a leech.

 

* * *

 

“Cassian, I am worried about Jyn's behavior.” Kaytoo announced one afternoon as they unloaded a ship hull of supplies. Cassian was getting assigned less and less undercover and intelligence ops. It was to the point that most of his duties were here on this base. It was startling, but at the same time: a relief.

 

Cassian looked up in surprise. Although a droid shouldn't be able to have feelings, a droid wasn't suppose to be as  _ colorful _ as Kaytoo was either. But given Kay and Jyn’s history, Cassian reckoned that Kay had chosen the term best suitable.

 

“Why’s that?” Cassian asked as he lifted another crate and moved it to the pile in the hanger.

 

“In the past eighteen cycles, Jyn has become less social and more violent. I originally calculated that this was not out of the ordinary, especially with previous incidents, but her recent behavior has made me reevaluate that assessment.”

 

Cassian paused briefly with his work. Even Kay, who was less socially adept than most droids, had noticed Jyn’s troubling behavior. He cleared his throat.

 

“Sometimes people have a bad day with their temper, Kay. Nothing to worry about.”

 

“Cassian, perhaps you were not listening to me. I said it had been  _ eighteen _ cycles, not one.”

 

Cassian sighed and sat his crate down. He looked Kay in the eye, otherwise called his  visual sensor. But the question that tumbled out of his mouth was not the one he had been expecting to ask:

 

“What made you reevaluate your calculation?”

 

“I checked Jyn’s schedule for each day. She should cross paths with you at least five times a day, yet you only mention seeing her at breakfast. If my calculations are correct:, Jyn is  _ avoiding _ you.”

 

Cassian felt something that felt terrifyingly like disappointment and hurt blossom through his chest. The most prominent emotion he felt was confusion.: Wwhy was she avoiding him?

 

“Just as well.” Kaytoo said suddenly, interrupting his thoughts. “The odds of finding trouble while around her are higher than usual. Perhaps I will finally get some peace around here.”

* * *

After twenty two cycles of Jyn avoiding him, Cassian decided that something was definitely wrong. Something that definitely wasn't going to go away.

 

At first, he had assumed it was something he had done, but then he considered what Bodhi said about Jyn no longer playing Sabaac with Baze. Sure enough, when Cassian had asked about it again, each member gave him the same answer: Jyn was avoiding them. 

 

But even with this knowledge, Cassian didn't have a kriffing clue where to start. He was good at reading people. He knew what most people were thinking before they did. But that was just it: Jyn wasn't most people.

 

He knew that from the moment he watched her risk her own life to get  a little girl to safety  in the middle of a battle. Most people would have let the girl go, but Jyn hadn't. 

 

But that feeling that Jyn was different, that she had potential but was shoving it down from years of hurt and abandonment, had evolved into something else. 

 

Cassian didn't see her just as a hardened woman who purposely ignored the hellish reality surrounding her,  nor did he see her just as the woman who stubbornly refused to give up. 

 

Now he saw her in a light that fell between the two. A woman who had loved and lost, who had lost faith and hope; and who, under the most tragic of circumstances, had regained that spark.

 

But even so, Cassian was at a loss with what to do, or how to find Jyn.

 

After two hours or so of searching the base to no avail, Cassian marched into the hangar. Defeat was ringing in his ears.

 

Then he picked up another sound: crying. 

 

He straightened and had almost convinced himself to leave (if one was crying in a hangar bay, they clearly wouldn’t want to be disturbed) but then he realized that it sounded familiar.

 

Taking a few steps forward, Cassian realized that the noise originated from the Imperial shuttle they had stolen during their mission to acquire the Death Star plans.

 

Cassian took a few steps inside and felt his heart sink. He caught sight of Jyn Erso tucked in a corner. Her ivory cheeks stained with tears as she clutched onto her Kyber crystal like it was a lifeline.

 

After a moment of hesitation,  Cassian moved toward her in a few swift steps. He knelt beside her and hesitantly placed a hand on her arm. She stilled but did not recoil. He took that as a good thing.

 

They sat in a long silence before Jyn pulled away from him and wiped furiously at her eyes. 

 

“You weren't suppose to see that.” she said, her tone in a way that suggested she expected him to judge her for breaking down.

 

“I couldn't leave you alone either.” Cassian replied. 

 

Jyn dragged her eyes up to meet his; unshed tears made her eyes glimmer. She sniffed. “You are a curious man, Cassian Andor.”

 

He didn't crack a smile, instead his eyes bore into hers. “Jyn, what's wrong?”

 

She gaped at him for a moment until she couldn't any longer; but Jyn twisted her head away from him, offering no answers. 

 

Another roll of thunder boomed overhead, causing Jyn to jump. She grabbed his arm with a vice like grip as her forest green eyes widened with fear.

 

Cassian swallowed painfully, the look on her face reminding himself of the panic he felt whenever a storm would wake him in the middle of the night; how with each clash of thunder, he had flashbacks to more battles than he could count. 

 

“What battle?” Cassian asked softly.

 

Jyn looked up suddenly with a stricken expression on her face, it was though she didn't believe anyone could understand. But how could he not? 

 

“The day my mother died...there was a storm. I never did like them, but mama would always sing me a lullaby so I would have something else to focus on. While I waited for Saw to rescue me, it began to storm outside. The only company I had was the darkness and the thunder.

 

“Then on Eadu...the rain, the thunder, the lightning….and my father. As he lied there, dying...I was a little girl again. I was hurt, angry and... _ scared. _ ” Jyn stopped abruptly. She seemed to realize that this was one of the most honest conversations they had had.

 

The silence stretched on and Cassian found himself remembering that day; the butt of his rifle against his shoulder, the rain that splattered against his coat and how his hair fell in his eyes. 

 

Moreover, he remembered the sight of Galen Erso at the end of his rifle’s scope. There was a deep breath here and a deep breath there...one heartbeat...two…and the mission would be complete.

 

But he couldn't do it. Cassian Andor had never,  _ never _ not completed a mission by disobeying a direct order.

 

It was a decision that still baffled him to this day . But his own introspection aside, there was a very real problem in front of him: Jyn Erso was still sniffling and crying.

 

A sudden urge overcame him, some protectiveness that kept rearing its head around Jyn. He wrapped his arms around her, embracing her in a hug. 

 

To his surprise and relief, he feared he may have overstepped, but boundaries seemed moot when it came to the two of them; Jyn’s arms snaked around his midsection. Her fingers grasped to the fabric of his uniform.

 

Her shoulders still shook from sobs. Cassian could only imagine the images that haunted her, the ghosts she was forced to see each day, awake or asleep. He pressed a kiss to the side of her head as his hand rubbed her back gently and soothingly.

 

Eventually her sobs subsided and she felt comfortable enough to pull away from his grasp. Feeling suddenly as though he had done something wrong, Cassian jerked his hands away. 

 

Jyn’s green eyes focused on him. Her gaze trailed down his face and back up to his eyes. She leaned forward. He felt his heart rate spike, but a buckle of thunder made Jyn jump backwards.

 

“Kriffing hell, I hate this planet.” She muttered, her voice all edge again. 

 

Cassian backed away and stood up. He understood what that meant: she had crumbled, she had cried, and she had put herself back together again. It was the only thing you could do in times like these.

 

Jyn stood and furiously wiped away tears. She smeared grease of some vague origin across her face. Cassian fought the urge to reach out and rub the muck away, knowing it would only land him some sort of injury.

 

The sharpness faded from Jyn’s expression.  Lightning illuminated the hanger and a almighty crash followed it. As she inhaled sharply,Cassian felt an idea spring to mind.

 

“You said you wanted to learn to fly, yeah?” Cassian asked, unable to contain the small smile that lit up his brown eyes.

 

“Yeah?” Jyn said, looking dubious. “I don’t think this is the weather to--”

 

“We won’t do it on the planet’s surface, then. We’ll do it up there.” Cassian said, jerking his index finger up toward the ceiling. Excitement was roaring through his veins. He shuffled to close the ramp, and headed to the front of the shuttle.

 

Jyn made a noise of frustration and followed him. She was clearly not impressed by his skills at explaining his plan.

 

“What do you mean ‘up there?’ And what are we going to do ‘up there?’” she demanded, falling dramatically into the co pilot seat.

 

Cassian, busy flicking switches and getting the controls set up, did not immediately answer. This was a risky move, but the Rebellion was already eager to get off this planet anyway. Draven had told Cassian as such the previous morning, a scowl written upon his face…

 

But if Cassian had learned anything since meeting Jyn Erso, he had a habit of bending the rules around her.

 

He started the engines and slowly guided the ship out of the hanger. Rain splattered against the ship. It made it damn near impossible to see anything. Below them was nothing but a churning maelstrom of water, a perfect mirror to the dark gray clouds above. 

 

Aegaeon reminded Cassian of Kamino, where the Clone Army had been manufactured. The planet, however; was on the opposite side of the galaxy. The planet was mostly empty, save the bizarre creatures that lurked beneath the waves.

 

According to one of the officers that was once a historian, most of the planet’s populace died out when the planet’s oceans began to merge. Now, dozens of oceans had become one, its mass nearly as large as the planet itself.

 

To make up for the lack of land, the remaining population built a city of platforms over the ocean to live in, but eventually something had happened to them as well, leaving the city empty.

 

The gray clouds blurred and then quickly receded from view, giving way to the breathtaking sight of space. Stars twinkled in their direction; some distance ahead was an asteroid (a place he was planning to stick clear of while he was teaching Jyn).

 

He twisted in his seat so that he was looking at Jyn, a feeling of triumph bubbling in his chest. “Your lesson begins.”

 

The expression on Jyn’s face was nothing less than astonishment. She looked out at the stars before snapping her head back at Cassian. 

 

“You're joking.” She said faintly, as though she didn't dare believe her luck. All evidence of her breakdown had faded.

 

“When have you known me to have a sense of humor?” Cassian asked dryly, the corners of his mouth twitched in amusement.

 

Jyn stared blankly at him and then turned to stare at the controls in horror rather than glee, and cried, “Have you gone barking mad?”

 

Well, that certainly wasn't the reaction Cassian had been expecting.

 

“I thought you wanted to learn to fly?” he said blankly, furiously wondering how he managed to make such an error in judgment.

 

“What if I crash?” Jyn demanded by way of answering. “What if the Empire finds us?”

 

“You’re not usually so worried about the Empire finding us. Or crashing things.” Cassian said thoughtfully, taking a step forward. “What's wrong?”

 

“If it was just me, I would be behind that wheel in a second. But you're with me. I won't be held responsible for you getting hurt if I screw something up.” Jyn replied determinedly, eyes locked with his. It was a far more direct and honest answer than he was expecting. 

 

“I’m not made of glass, Jyn.” Cassian retorted, his mouth inexplicably dry as she took another step toward him.

 

Her hand landed on his cheek, her thumb stroking his stubble softly. Cassian found himself entranced by her green eyes, remembering the moment they’d shared in the elevator on Scarif. He had thought of kissing her, but he hadn't. 

 

Ever since, he found himself by her side whenever possible. His heart raced whenever she smiled at him, and every time they touched, he felt warmth shoot through his insides. 

 

And he had a feeling (one that had been confirmed some time ago by Chirrut) that Jyn felt the same way and they were just dancing around their feelings.

 

Now it seemed as if she was tired of dancing.

 

“No, you're not. You’re Kyber. Strong, reliable, always there for me.” Jyn whispered. 

 

“I think you’re the only one who deserves the Kyber analogy.” Cassian said, looking down at her with heavily lidded eyes.

 

Jyn didn't bother answering with words: she leaned forward and her lips landed on his. The singular, gentle touch sparked an instant reaction and Cassian’s arms wrapped around her waist, bringing her flush against him.

 

She gasped against his mouth, but replied by tilting her head so slightly to get a better angle. With each kiss, the lighter he felt. It was like all the gravity in the ship had disappeared.

 

Her fingers ran through his hair, bringing his head further down toward her and his heart did a somersault as he realized that this was real.

 

Eventually they parted, but kept their foreheads pressed together. Questions swirled in Cassian's head, but he couldn't voice them just yet. He was mostly attempting to figure out how his idea of teaching her to fly and her being adamant against it had led to this.

 

Jyn seemed to have thought the same thing and pulled away suddenly, looked mortified. “I’m sorry, I shouldn't have done that without talking about it with you first.”

 

“Sorry? Jyn...I’ve been wanting to do that since Scarif, I just couldn't bring myself to because...because you deserve someone better.” 

 

“I don't see anyone better than you, Cass. You're there for me, you  _ understand _ me, which is more to be said than  most. You're not perfect, like me. But you try to do the right thing.” Jyn replied, sinking down into the pilot seat.

 

“So do you.” Cassian replied softly, taking her lead and sitting in the co pilot’s seat. “You have a knack for doing the right thing.”

 

“I don't think kissing someone at the absolute worst time is doing the right thing.” Jyn said with a raised eyebrow. “Seems to be more of a selfish thing.”

 

“okay, maybe it’s not the right thing for the universe at large, but I think it was for us. We’ll never get a perfect time to be together, Jyn. We have to own the time that we do have.” Cassian said.

 

“I love you, Cassian Andor.” Jyn said with a warm smile on her face. 

 

Cassian felt incredibly light again and a grin had split across his face. 

 

“I love you, Jyn Erso.” He replied, reaching forward to take her hand. They fell silent for awhile until Cassian asked, “Does this...ah, does this mean we're… _ together _ now?”

 

Jyn used her free hand to shove him playfully. “Like you're gonna get rid of me after  _ this. _ ”

 

“Are you willing to learn to fly now?”

 

“I  _ told _ you I don't want you to get hurt if I screw it up-”

 

“Alright, I dare you to learn how to fly. Whoever wins the bet of how well you can fly, gets to pick dinner.” Cassian said.

 

“Well if I win, we’ll be too dead for dinner. So this sounds like a bet that only works in your favor.” Jyn retorted.

 

“Alright. I take back the dinner. But I still dare you.” Cassian replied.

 

“I hate you.” Jyn muttered, glaring at him, knowing full well she couldn't pass up on a dare.

 

“Love you, too.” Cassian replied with an innocent smile.

 

* * *

 

When they got back to base, the ship was still intact and their lecture from Draven only lasted five minutes, which was a personal record. 

 

They walked down the corridors to the mess hall, hand in hand, talking animatedly about Jyn’s (admittedly rough) piloting skills.

 

After getting their food, they made their way to the table they shared with the rest of the Rogue One team. Baze and Bodhi were playing Sabaac (judging from the look on Baze’s face, he was winning) while Chirrut chuckled whenever Baze or Bodhi would start bickering.

 

As soon as Cassian and Jyn sat down, Baze looked in their direction and groaned. “Dammit...they’re holding hands.”

 

“I believe this is one of the cases where I say ‘I told you so.’” Chirrut said with a knowing smile. 

 

“You're just happy because you don't have to clean the bunk tomorrow morning.” Baze retorted. 

 

“I am happy that they are happy.” Chirrut replied stubbornly. 

 

At Jyn and Cassian’s bewildered looks, Bodhi leaned toward them and explained: “As soon as the ship took off, they made a bet on if you’d be together when you returned. Whoever lost had to clean up their bunk.”

 

“Well, Chirrut was right twice. We  _ are _ happy.” Jyn said with a smile and squeezed Cassian's hand. 

 

He returned the smile as the group fell back into conversation. The entire time, Jyn’s hand never left his.

* * *

 

That night, Jyn accompanied Cassian to his room. As he went to the fresher to change, she plopped down on the bed.

 

“It's clean in here,” Jyn said, a tinge of disappointment in her voice. “My room is a stye compared to yours.”

 

“Which is why you decided to stay in here?” Cassian asked, returning to the room. 

 

“I decided to stay here because you make me feel safe. I was...I don't know...I was hoping I wouldn't have nightmares if I stayed with you.” Jyn replied, unable to meet his eye.

 

“Well, you can't know until you've tried.” Cassian said with a shrug.

 

Within a few moments, they had found a comfortable position on the bed: Jyn had her back pressed against his chest and he had his arm draped around her waist.

 

The moment was peaceful, but Cassian kept mulling over a question he had not gotten an answer to yet. 

 

“Jyn, can I ask you something?” Cassian asked.

 

“As long as it’s not about who put ‘Han Organa’ on Solo’s identification card, go ahead.” Jyn replied sleepily. “It was me and Bodhi, though. You mustn't say a word.”

 

Deciding not to comment on their prank, Cassian cleared his throat and said, “Kaytoo said he thought you were avoiding me. I was wondering if-”

 

“If that's true?” Jyn guessed with a sigh. “It is. But only because you know me too well. I didn't want to admit there was anything going on with me. I was avoiding  _ everyone _ because of it. But Bodhi, Chirrut and Baze know when to leave well alone. You don’t. You’re like a mother hen.”

 

“You give me plenty to worry about.” Cassian replied.

 

Jyn laughed and rolled over so that she was facing him. She tilted her head up to meet his eye.

 

“No more keeping things from each other. That should be a rule.” Jyn said. “If something's bothering us, we tell each other.”

 

“I like that idea.” Cassian replied, pressing a kiss to her forehead. 

 

She wrapped her arm around him in response and within a few moments, she was snoring.

  
Cassian fell asleep not long after, and this time he had no nightmares.


End file.
